I knew. Deep in my soul I knew there was something wrong with my marriage. It was an overnight thing. I didn't see any clues, it was like one day everything was fine and the next day I knew. If I think about it today I can feel all the things I felt almost 6 years ago. I can feel the panic and the insecurities that I never felt being married to him. I didn't even feel this horrible feelings dating others before my marriage. I knew.
So I know he knew. People can't live together for years and not know what each other is doing. Women and men are so different and handle do things so differently that I didn't know the pain I caused because he kept going like nothing happened. I guess that's what I am doing, going on but inside I am dying. I know people use the word dying very care free but I truly believe that everyday my soul cracks a little and one day there will no soul left.
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